Let’s set the scene. It’s early January and those brand-new pajamas you’re hibernating in are beginning to smell like a bear. You’ve thrown them in the washing machine and dried them on a hot cycle that shrunk them down to an unwearable size. There’s a light snow falling outside the laundry room window, and as you hold your pj’s in disgust, you catch a glimpse of the juncos and finches happily eating continuously from the bird feeder. Right now, eating continuously sounds like a good idea. Should you chuck the jammies or try to stuff your head through an opening the size of a donut? It’s a moment of truth for the year 2022. What you need is a fresh start even though you just were given a fresh start a week ago. Truth be told, you’re ready for another present, aren’t you?
Well…here’s it is. They aren’t new pajamas, but a list called Achieve Peace of Mind. On the list are ten ways to help you reboot when your proverbial underwear is in a knot. My list is printed on a pocket card I can pull out when I’m fit to be tied and losing the dots on my dice. Check these out:
- Find something bigger than yourself in which to believe
- Cultivate old-fashioned virtues
- Develop healthy boundaries
- Shun suspicion and resentment
- Live in the present and the future, but mostly the present
- Don’t waste time and energy fighting conditions you can’t change
- Cooperate with life
- Refuse to pity yourself
- Stop expecting too much out of yourself and others
- Remember: we are all frail
Reading through these I’m sure you’ll hasten to add your own wisdoms, ones like the Golden Rule, or perhaps a beatitude or verse from the Psalms. However, if you are like me, long verses and lots of words can be confusing when an albatross is flying overhead. I need a few mantras to focus on until that bird has flown the coop.
I’d like to lead with the first one: finding something bigger than myself to believe in. That is the bookend that keeps all the others on the list from falling over. For me, that bigger voice is God and the Holy Spirit, but maybe you need to start elsewhere. I can tell you that when I am in a funk, and nothing seems to be working quite right, that quiet and simple step is the best and the hardest one to lean into. It’s about surrendering, and when you do, the rest of those items on the list for achieving peace of mind will come right over and eat out of your hand.
One of my wife’s favorite mottos is to allow mystery to have a place in your life. It’s very freeing to do this because it allows things to go unanswered for the time being. Allow is the key word here. It works the same way surrender does but sounds a lot less religious. Mystery isn’t the same as mental laziness. Mystery is happening, it’s real, it’s moving and active. Mystery is everywhere. It’s the reason the label you missed on your jammies says 100% cotton and is printed in ancient Polynesian. It’s the reason you are cultivating old fashioned virtues and considering sleeping in your boxers like they did in the old days. You’re feeling more peaceful already…see how that works?